Street performing, I mean, it is one of the...
It's a fascinating thing. I mean, basically what you've gotta do is,
unlike in a theatre where people have paid to come and see you
and they also have got some idea of you.
There's the good and the bad things about street performing.
First when you go out in the street, people simply expect you to be awful.
'Cause you're standing there. They haven't paid anything.
Um, in the middle of a shopping centre, you're dressed stupidly
or you're standing there obviously about to do some sort of show,
they stand back, they don't wanna get close to you.
I mean, it is just like being a pariah. It's like being a modern-day leper.
You might as well just ring a bell saying "Unclean."
So they don't wanna go anywhere near you.
And then you start doing something.
And it's very interesting, the beginning of a show.
I mean, different street performers have different techniques.
My own personal one, I used to basically just
put my suitcase down and take stuff out.
And what happens is, you're slightly differently dressed.
And I used to pull out my unicycle, my machetes and my whip,
and my teddy bear.
And I always had the thing of not paying any attention to them.
So walking to the suitcase, putting something out,
walking back, putting something out.
And by this time,
there's usually maybe five, six people just sort of watching you.
And because you're not paying any attention,
there's a thing, almost like you have confidence,
because you're not looking at them, going,
"Come on, everyone, let's go do a show." Which, by the way, doesn't work.
You just pay no attention to them until you're ready.
And you take your time.
I think, psychologically, it strikes in the eyes of the people watching,
I'm sure there's this little thing going,
"This guy seems confident.
"And he seems to know what he's doing, so he's going to be okay."
'Cause the big fear for the audience is that you're going to be awful.
I think everyone knows, you know, if you've ever seen a bad stand-up
or someone who can't sing, whatever, there's a feeling in the audience.
You don't wanna be there 'cause you feel that embarrassment.
So I used to do this thing of just putting my stuff out.
And then when it was ready, my first thing to the audience was,
you know, basically I would say, "I'm going to do a show now.
"Most shows are about 20 minutes. This one's four hours."
So really down play it.
And I used to see people going, "Four hours?"
And walking away sometimes. And then I'd basically say,
"And, by the way, I've seen the show many times myself
"and it's really crap."
So there's this thing straight away. You're playing on this,
this isn't going to be very good. But because they know you're confident,
and they know you've got the unicycle, and the whip and machetes,
there's a feeling that you're so strong that
this guy is gonna be good.
And I've got a Liverpool accent, which really helps,
'cause they think automatically,
you're from Liverpool, you're bound to be funny.
Whether it's true or not, that's what they think.
So at this point, already for me, it worked.
I mean, it always worked for me.
And like a lot of street performers, from the very first day, I was fine.
My career actually started off like that and now it's gone downhill.
Most people's work their way up.
So because I've done this thing where I've got my stuff out
and I've told them I'm going to be rubbish,
they also have this thing because they're an audience, going,
"We'll decide whether you're going to be rubbish or not.
"Don't tell us."
And of course once the first four, five minutes,
if you do that,
usually they like you.
So straight away, 'cause once they like you, that's it.
And then you do the rest of the show.
And, of course, at the end of it, if you're any good,
you know, they've seen you on a big, tall unicycle,
and you're being funny and you're being charming and witty,
and you're all these sort of things.
And then it's a really weird thing because basically what's happened is
they're stopped in the street by this total stranger who's come out.
And when you're a good street performer, it's very, very, very powerful
because you start off as this idiot by himself
and suddenly there's, like, 150 people watching you.
And you can feel this real power. And you can see people going,
"This guy seems to know what's going on in the world."
You know, 'cause that's what we all look around for,
people who are good and people who seem to have the answer to life.
And then you have this amazing thing and, of course, at the end of it,
when you sort of say, "Oh, by the way, this is my living.
"Give me a pound each of you," whatever, you can see them going,
"Yeah, this guy's entertained us for, like, 45 minutes
"and, you know, we thought he was gonna be rubbish
"and in fact he's been very good."
So people then start giving you money.
And it is... When you do a great street show,
I mean, it's in the summer, you're at a festival and you go out,
it's fantastic, 'cause you do...
It's one of the few jobs in life where you do something
and people come up to you afterwards and say,
"You know, that was the best thing I've ever seen.
"You should be on television. You're fantastic.
"Marry my daughter. You're wonderful."
I mean, that's the great side of it. And there's always the other side of it.
You've been stuck in Munich for, like, four weeks,
it's rained every day,
you've had to fight with the drunks on the streets,
you've had arguments with the police,
somebody's stolen your tent, you know, you've been rubbish.
But I've had days when I've gone out and done, maybe, two shows.
And on the first show people have said,
"That was the best thing we've ever seen."
And then two hours later, I've done another show,
and people have gone, "That's rubbish that."
So it's a real up and down world.
And I think you learn very quickly the ability
to take on board what people say.
So when they say, "You're great," you think, "Yeah, I'm okay."
And when they say, "You're rubbish," you think, "Yeah, I'm okay."
And so you know where you are, somewhere in the middle.
Street performing when it's good is just the best thing in the world.
And when it's bad, it's awful.